She sat there across the table from me, looking positively radiant. I don’t think there can be a better word to describe Her. Just radiant.
Stop staring like that, you’re embarrassing Me.
I can’t help being nervous. A regular date is bad enough; but this is God. She’s the alpha and the omega, Ahura Mazda and Ahrimaan. She’s the creator / protector / destroyer, omnipotent / omnipresent / omniscient…
Not tonight, I’m none of those things. I’m just a regular human being. Does that help ?
Yes, it does. It also explains why me, a mere mortal, have survived. On hearing Her voice, my head hasn’t exploded and my chest hasn’t caved in.
Boo! Naah, don’t worry. I don’t use my scary voice unless I’m pissed.
Eek, I’ll be careful then. She smiles very sweetly, and I start talking about Her job. (not a great opening, but in my defense, I was nervous). She’s been at it for ever, don’t you know. She can’t get fired, She has no competition and She has no peer-review (which follows, since She has no peer)…
Hey that’s hardly fair…
Wait, wait. I’ve not finished… but there is a downside too; She has no pay, no raises, no vacation, and worst, She can never quit.
That’s an odd way of describing it, but yeah, in a nutshell, that is My job. Like any job, it’s got it’s ups and downs.
Whew, for a moment I thought She was gonna get angry. The old testament talks at length about God’s wrath; it wouldn’t do any good to test it’s veracity now, would it ? I change the subject to Hitchhikers Guide; if the answer is 42, I’m sure She knows what the question is…
_Nope, can’t tell ya. But "We apologise for the inconvenience".
_
Har har, very funny. And to think Nietzsche said she was dead!
It’s been said before, but Nietzsche is the one who’s dead.
She really does have a sense of humour. There’s a lull, and I’m reluctant to ask the millions of questions buzzing in my head. Why are we here ? Is there really an afterlife and hell ? When is Armageddon ? Not to seem tongue tied, I hum a few bars from that song of Joan Osborne, and She flashes me another brilliant smile.
Which one is that, the Joan Osborne version of the Bob Rivers version ?
Bob Rivers!! WHAT if God smoked Cannibus ? Does she really….
What do you think, silly ? I invented the stuff, didn’t I ?
We spoke of this and that, mostly just small stuff, nothing of great theological gravity. It was a wonderful and pleasant evening.
Thanks for a lovely evening. Do keep in touch!
And then she was… everywhere. Quite the opposite of gone, really. I see the world now through radiance coloured glasses. Sorry if I sound like some bible-thumping born-again redneck Christian, but I think I’m in love with God.